This letter to Dear Prudence has to be a joke, right? I mean there probably are people who are this awful but most of them wouldn’t say it out loud, right?
Sadly, I expect this lady is real and she resents “poor” people coming to her house for the good candy. And by “poor,” I expect she means middle class suburban folks and not a bunch of unwashed inner city kids who aren’t worthy to sell her kids a hamburger at McDonald’s.
Her good candy is for the rich little boys and girls! Why is that so hard for the other 99% to understand? If they get full-sized Kit-Kat bars on Halloween instead of the fun size that they deserve, they will start expecting rich people to provide them everything! Isn’t it enough that they are job providers?
Holy shit, lady. If you have to hand out an extra hundred candy bars, are you suddenly going to miss a Porsche payment? Will your underprivileged children be unable to join you in Rome for Christmas? If you have such a problem giving to people who make less than you, just turn off your light so the kids from the rich families that aren’t as rich as yours don’t come to your house either.
I wish this lady had included her home address so everyone could go to her house this Halloween. We should all give her a fucking candy bar. Only the fun size though. We can’t afford the good stuff.
For those unfamiliar with the term, doxxing is when people take personal information (like home address and private e-mail accounts) and share them with everyone on the internet. The intent is to encourage others to harass the individual in question either online or in person.
Because people are assholes.
Chris Kluwe wrote a profanity ridden rant against GamerGaters earlier in the week. Was his contact information splashed all over the internet? Of course not.
What is interesting about the Gamergate phenomenon is that they claim this issue is not about women in gaming and yet when women speak up, they suffer harassment almost immediately. I’m not saying Kluwe didn’t get called names. He probably did.
The difference, though, is Kluwe (and Wil Wheton) were called names. Day had her personal information tweeted out within an hour.
Now I’m fairly certain a brief internet search could have yielded her home address. That information may be private but it is hard to protect. Her personal e-mail would take a little more digging but probably isn’t too hard to get. Privacy is an illusion the internet is rapidly dispelling.
None of that changes the fact doxxing is an asshole move. The only purpose is to harass the victim rather than engage in civil discourse.
GamerGate is not about ethics. It is about being pissy because female gamers (and their allies) would like a few games for themselves. It also has an unoriginal and stupid name.
She didn’t cancel the talk because she was threatened, you understand. She was still going to speak.
But she asked for protection against someone who claimed he was going to open fire on her and Utah law prevented police from patting down attendees at the event.
So a guy (I’m assuming it was a guy) threatens to shoot her and the police can’t even stop anyone from carrying a gun to her talk. Because the right to carry a firearm wherever the fuck you want is more important than the right to keep people with firearms out of a place where someone has threatened to kill people with a firearm.
And spare me the good guy with the gun/bad guy with a gun thing. If the bad guy with a gun gets into the event, he (again I’m assuming it is a guy) will be able to kill his target before anyone kills him. And that’s all he cares about.
So best case scenario is this asshole (who was probably making empty threats but they still worked) would have died after accomplishing his stated goal. Which is what he expected would happen anyway. Great solution, Utah!
Please note that I’m not talking about Gamergate for a few reasons. First, it has been talked to death and the people doing most of the talking are assholes who don’t deserve my time.
And second, we need to stop naming every scandal after Watergate. It is just so completely unoriginal. Have you guys heard of the Teapot Dome Scandal? That’s a great name for a scandal! Now everything is NounGate.
Nixon is dead, folks. We need to move on.
Note: what I’m writing is not intended to be a eulogy or memorial for anyone. These are my thoughts inspired by the passing of a peripheral friend. My friend Melissa Kaercher wrote a terrific memorial. I suggest you read it.
Over the weekend, news came that a peripheral friend was severely ill and would soon pass away. Within 24 hours, we learned that she was gone.
I’m not going to pretend that I knew Holly very well. Sadly, I didn’t know her very well at all.
I’m a performer so it could be assumed that I’m an extrovert. And sometimes I am.
When I find myself in large group situations, however, I tend to gravitate towards people I know well. It takes me a long time to open up to new people. That isn’t their fault. It’s mine.
I knew Holly because she attended Butt-Numb-a-Thon – a gigantic, weird film festival I also attend every year. I talked to her for a few minutes here and there. But I didn’t really know her. She was one of dozens of people with whom I have a glancing relationship for one weekend every year.
She’s gone now and what I see online is an outpouring of love on her Facebook wall. Yet that wall isn’t her. It is a digital shadow of her.
I don’t believe in an afterlife so I don’t believe she will ever see any of the kind words that were written about her. They are there, perhaps, for her family or loved ones but more, I think, for the person who left the post.
I don’t believe there is anything wrong with that. We all have to process grief in the way that feels right for us. Grief is not for the dead, it is for the living.
I’m more amazed at how there is a shadow Holly out there on the internet who will be there for some indeterminate length of time and who acts as a surrogate for the person who is no longer there. The posts will cease after a while but she will still be there in some strange sense.
There’s an idea for a horror movie in there…
Looking at the outpouring of love for someone who is no longer with us, I have made a decision.
Kind words spoken to a ghost in the machine aren’t enough for me. I think I need to say kind words to those who are still alive.
So yesterday, I decided to honor the memory of Holly (and so many other friends who have passed) by telling people I appreciate them while they are still around to read it.
If you get a personal message from me tomorrow or next week or next year, that’s why. One message a day. Give or take.
Life is short. You never know when someone will exit your life forever. I’d like everyone to know how important they are to me while they are still around to appreciate it.
An appeals court had to overturn this idiotic ruling so I guess sometimes the judicial system works. Eventually.
If we are to believe this “irrational” mother’s story, she chose to give her child her own last name after the father abused her during the pregnancy. The judge in the case felt that she just wasn’t in the right mind to make that sort of decision and, I guess, thought it would case harm to the child if the child didn’t have his father’s last name.
An appeals court saw it differently and apparently felt the judge in the case was far more irrational than the mother.
This last name thing is problematic to begin with. I like my last name so when I got married, I kept it. That’s totally fine because I’m a dude and nobody questions when a man wants to keep his name.
Nobody questions when parents given their child the father’s last name.
But if a woman wants to keep her last name or give her last name to a child, well then it is time to take the case to court, I guess.
It’s a double standard. And a stupid one.
The particular article I linked to calls it “Obama’s Common Core” even though the President had nothing to do with it. However, if you are conservative and don’t like something in government, you need to blame it on Obama.
Common core mathematics actually tries to teach kids how to do math the same way we already do it in our heads. As has been explained every time someone new complains about Common Core.
Suddenly, the whole thing has become a liberal vs. conservative thing. Look at how these liberals are messing up education with their weird math stuff!
Common core is a tool kids can use to learn math. Any good teacher will tell you that it is not the only tool and the more tools we give kids, the better the odds will be that they can learn.
Common core isn’t turning your kids into Democrats! Obama doesn’t want your kids to be bad at math.
He just wants them to commit voter fraud! They don’t teach that in Math class.