Shit that Pissed me off – 1/31

Oklahoma Lawmaker Wants To Ban All Marriages

There we have it ladies and gentlemen, the nuclear option!  If we can’t stop those pesky gays from getting married, we’ll just stop everyone from getting married.

We all knew this had to happen eventually, right?  While these people aren’t bigots or homophobes (just ask them), they are willing to carpet bomb the entire idea of marriage rather than allow that their idea of what marriage should be in not the only valid one.

When you write stuff down in your idea journal in the morning, sometimes it should stay in the idea journal

In the process, a party that seems really interested in preserving the rights of the small businessperson is willing to propose a law that will screw over thousands of them!  Every event planner, photographer, florist and baker in Oklahoma will lose a whole lot of income if there aren’t any weddings.

But who are we kidding?  Churches will still be allowed to perform weddings.  And because they are churches, they are welcome to discriminate (or not discriminate) in any way they see fit.

Convenient.

Article Tells You Why You Should Never Put A Lemon In Your Glass of Water – Except It Doesn’t say That

The continuing tend on Facebook that drives me nuts is the shocking “YOU WON’T BELIEVE WHAT YOU’LL READ IN THIS ARTICLE!!”  In this case, the headline on shared Facebook posts warn folks that they should never, ever put a lemon in their water.  Ever.

Well shit, thought I, I like lemon in my water.  Why should I never ever put lemon in my water?  Ever.

I clicked through and discovered that the article is specifically talking about lemons in restaurants because there are organisms that might be on the lemons.  Oh noes!

The article itself isn’t anywhere near as alarming as the headline but then you have the final paragraph (emphasis mine):

But before you freak out, here’s some perspective: His research has turned up similar organisms all over restaurants, from ketchup bottles and salt and pepper shakers to menus and table surfaces. And the same likely goes for a variety of other drink garnishes, including onions, limes and your cherry on top. Aside from basic hygiene, like hand washing and choosing a clean restaurant, sometimes you really do have to trust your immune system to do its job. “Microbes are ubiquitous … You’re not going to escape unscathed forever,” he says. “You do your best to prevent unnecessary illness.”

So basically, lemons have some freaky organisms all over them.  So does everything else in the restaurant.

Why did I read this again?

Guy Shoots And Kills Two Men Who Were Trespassing On Their Own Property

I don’t view this as a gun control issue.  This is a self-control issue.

The guy saw two men breaking into a shed that he thought was his.  He was wrong.  Instead of calling the police, though, he just shot ’em with a rifle without any sort of warning.

It’s like target practice with people!

They weren’t posing any imminent threat.  How could they?  They were on their own property.

What gets lost in all this debate over the second amendment is the fact that even if you are allowed to own a gun, you have to be responsible with the fucking thing.  Having the right to own a gun is not the same thing as having the right to shoot any time you think someone might be doing something wrong.

Ted Cruz Claims The Republicans Didn’t Shut Down The Government

I recognize my own biases on this subject but John Boehner even admitted that shutting down the government was a Republican tactic.  Cruz is trying to re-write history because the tactic didn’t work.

In fact, it completely backfired.  I can understand that when you make an idiotic mistake, you want to avoid talking about it but pretending that the mistake was someone else’s is pretty sleazy.  Since the Obama administration blundered pretty massively on the launch of the Affordable Care Act, Cruz doesn’t need to blame them for something his party did.

But he wants to change the narrative.  Not because he’s embarrassed by the shut down.  He probably isn’t.  He just recognizes that the public was really pissed off and most of that ire was aimed at his party.  So he’s changing the story to suit his ambitions.

That wouldn’t piss me off so much were it not for the fact that the folks who are completely enamored with Cruz will believe him.

Apparently, Pregnancy Is A Pre-Existing Condition

I’m linking to an online petition.  I’d love to find the original story just to verify facts but this appears to be genuine.

Here’s the dirty secret everyone should already know – insurance companies don’t make money when they accept claims.  This is true of car insurance…home insurance…health insurance…anything.  So they will look for any reason to deny a claim.  Even if their reason is kind of bogus.

You know why?

Because they are counting on you to decide that it isn’t worth the fight.

The first rule of insurance club is you don’t talk about insurance club

That, I think, is what’s going on in this situation.  The reasons the insurance company keeps rejecting the claim is because they figure at some point this couple will give up.

I don’t even get how pregnancy can be a pre-existing condition. Especially when she wasn’t pregnant when her insurance took effect.

I mean, is it a pre-existing condition if a woman has viable eggs and she lives within 100 yards of a man who might ejaculate sperm?

Scientist Sues NASA Because He Thinks They Aren’t Studying The Right Rock

Because NASA just has shit tons of cash lying around to defend themselves against frivolous lawsuits.

The guy is basically alleging that the Curiosity Rover, which is spending much of its time on Mars looking for signs of life, should be looking for signs of life.

Why does he allege this?  Because of a picture of one rock that looks different from all the other rocks!

The fact it looks different leads to the logical conclusion that it must not be a rock.  You know, because every rock on Earth looks the same so therefore every rock on Mars must also look the same.

Scientists at NASA claim they have studied high-resolution photographs of this rock and it is, in fact, a rock.  This guy wants to see the high-resolution photographs himself and he thinks it is highly irregular that they won’t let him see them.

What are they hiding?

He’s going to find out!

What a kook.

Utah School Throws Away Kids Lunches Because Their Parents Hadn’t Paid The Bill

So you have about 40 elementary school students who have no idea that their lunch accounts are overdrawn.  Apparently, the school hadn’t told the parents yet and so the kids “accidentally” got their meals.

Ooops!  No biggie, right.  Just let the kids eat today and deal with it tomorrow, right?

No way!  No freeloading for those elementary school students!

Look at these moochers! Why aren’t they paying for their own education?

The solution, of course, was to take the lunches away from the kids in front of the other students and then throw them away!

Boy did they teach those kids’ parents a lesson!

The dumbass factor on this action is staggering.

Alabama is Debating A Law That Could Allow Doctors To Refuse Medical Attention If A Woman Is Miscarrying

There is a level of anti-abortion mania that borders on pedophilia.

Because some of these folks really love unborn children.

This Alabama bill allows a hospital to refuse emergency room care for a woman who could be losing her baby.  Seems to me the basic idea is if a woman needs an emergency abortion and the doctor is just too filled with god’s love to save her life, he’s not going to get in trouble for letting her die.

The bill doesn’t specify abortion, though.  It could, therefore, be used to protect medical personnel who refused to assist a woman having a miscarriage which, we all know (or at least we should), means the fetus isn’t viable.

If someone died as a result, this law would protect the hospital from a lawsuit.  Based on religious freedom, I guess.

Which is complete bullshit.  Where is the moral ambiguity in helping a living person versus helping a dying fetus?  There is no religious justification for such a thing and there should be no legal justification either.  Refusing to provide medical care to a woman in that situation is murder.  Plain and simple.

If you don’t get that, you should really ask yourself why you are so obsessed with unborn children.

Conservative Groups Call For Boycott Of Girl Scout Cookies Because They Aren’t Teaching Girls Abortion Is Evil

I get that conservative groups just hate the shit out of Wendy Davis right now.  She’s a younger version of Nancy Pelosi or something.

So when one representative of the Girl Scouts linked to one article that mentioned Davis as an “inspiring woman from 2013” (and she was – even if she didn’t happen to inspire you), a few Conservative groups saw an opportunity to brand the girl scouts as “abortion friendly.”

Now I’m pro-choice which means so what if they are but really so what if they are?

Are you going to slam the door on a little girl and call her a baby killer?  Is that your play?  Is that how you want to convince people abortion is wrong?

BABY KILLER! Someone get me a bucket of red paint!

If you want to end abortion, you are not going to do it by cutting back on Thin Mints.

Because Thin Mints are the nectar of the gods and if you somehow managed to end girl scout cookies with this ridiculous boycott, I will find you and I will kill you.

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About Petsnakereggie

Geek, movie buff, dad, musician, comedian, atheist, liberal and writer. I also really like Taco flavored Doritos.

2 responses to “Shit that Pissed me off – 1/31”

  1. Jess says :

    Nah, there are WAY too many of us who buy extra GS cookies BECAUSE the GS don’t preach anti-abortion garbage: thin mints forever!!

    Ireland has anti-abortion laws like the one you listed this week: the result of that stupidity was the death of a young Indian woman who had a late-term miscarriage and went for help. Docs wouldn’t touch her because there was still a fetal heartbeat. She died of sepsis. She wasn’t Catholic: abortion wasn’t against her religion in the first place. Last I heard her husband was suing the hospital and the government for letting his wife die a horrible death that could’ve been prevented. Because the life of a (already dying) fetus is WAY more important than the adult woman carrying it. Sigh.

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