Shit that Pissed me Off – 2/2

Predominantly White Church Advertises for a Black Reader to help Increase their Diversity

When you read the ad, you think it has to be a complete fabrication because nobody would be so stupid as to say they are looking for an African-American to make them look more diverse. They certainly wouldn’t be so crass as to offer $10 and “all the doughnuts you can carry, would they?”

And they definitely wouldn’t include “must be able to read” in the job description, right?

This is a tricky one to write about because while the ad looks genuine, I haven’t been able to find the source. Snopes is silent on it so far so I’m going to guess it is genuine.  Or maybe it isn’t.

I’m so upset about something right now, but I don’t know what it is!

Thing is – if it is some kind of joke post to generate a response from the internet, it is too believable to be funny. The reason it is generating a response is because it doesn’t feel like something that is impossible. And I mean, who is your target for ridicule? Black people who would be justifiably offended by it?

So either this is real and it was generated by a clueless moron or it is fake and it was generated by a clueless moron.

Cleveland Indians to Abandon their Chief Wahoo Logo after the 2018 Season

If you have ever seen the current logo of the Cleveland Indians, you would, I hope, recognize that it is shockingly racist. Fortunately, after only 70 years, the organization and Major League Baseball have decided that they give just enough of a damn about the feelings of Natives to retire the image.

Sort of.

They will still have the image on team uniforms in 2018. And you can still buy official team merchandise in the gift shop on the Major League Baseball website. But in 2019 you won’t be able to buy any merchandise with Chief Wahoo at all…on the MLB website. If you want to buy it off of the Cleveland Indians website, you still can.

If you’d like to know what Chief Wahoo looks like, I’m afraid you’ll need to read another blog.

The entire announcement didn’t ever acknowledge that Chief Wahoo is racist as fuck. MLB simply said the image was “no longer appropriate for on field use.”

It was never appropriate for on field use. You know why?

Because it is racist as fuck.

This is not debatable. Chief Wahoo is a racist caricature. And fans are upset because they love the logo. Someone needs to tell them that loving the logo is not OK. It doesn’t absolve you from being racist if your response to the racism is “but I like the racism!”

DC Fans are Going to Sabotage Rotten Tomatoes Reviews of Black Panther

Citing the “massive” success of angry Star Wars fans who didn’t get the movie they wanted in The Last Jedi torpedoing the audience score on Rottentomatoes, butthurt DC movie fans are now hoping to do the same thing to Black Panther.

You may recall that there was a Justice League film last year. As recent DC films go, it wasn’t bad. I mean, it wasn’t Wonder Woman but it wasn’t bad.

Do I think Black Panther is going to be better than Justice League?

Uh…yeah.

I tell you what, butthurt DC fans. Instead of trying to torpedo a movie’s rating on Rottentomatoes, how about you insist DC make better movies?

Martha? WHY DID YOU SAY THAT NAME???

Also, how was the audience rating on Rottentomatoes such a problem for The Last Jedi? Didn’t it still make piles of money (It was number one at the box office for 2017)? I mean yeah, it got hammered in the audience rating but I’ll bet Episode IX will still do fine.

And if they hammer Black Panther, do you think it will hurt the box office of Avengers: Infinity War?

Seriously – if you want better DC movies, how about you torpedo the rating of other Warner Brothers movies?

Republican Candidate for Congress in Wisconsin Makes me Want Paul Ryan to Win

I’m no fan of Paul Ryan but next to Paul Nehlen, who is running against Ryan in the Republican primary, he looks positively progressive.  Nehlen recently published a list of Jews in the media who have attacked him in the last month.

We shall ignore the fact that his list is not even accurate and focus on the fact that this guy is a Nazi. And he’s running for public office out in the open like other people who aren’t Nazis.

It is important we differentiate between Paul Ryan, who advances policies meant to benefit almost exclusively white upper class Americans and Paul Nehlen, who would like to see to it that only whites are American. Unless they are also Jewish. Then we still have a problem.

This guy doesn’t deserve to be a candidate for water commissioner (which is an important job and people like me shouldn’t make fun of it). You know why?

Because he’s a Nazi and the last time Nazis were in power, it didn’t go well for anyone who wasn’t a Nazi.

Actually, it ended up pretty bad for the people who were Nazis as well. But we don’t care because they were Nazis and we shouldn’t care.

So what should happen with this guy is not the inevitable rejection he will receive in the primaries. It should be rejection on a grander scale. He should be laughed out of debates. He should not be treated with one shred of respect by the news media.

Make him an example to every racist shitbag of a candidate. It isn’t your politics we hate. It’s you.

Meme that Pissed me Off

I’ve been writing this blog long enough that friends occasionally tag me with suggestions. This week, a friend pointed me to this post State of the Union Meme:

Ha ha ha! Look at how dumb his generation is!

News flash: His generation didn’t elect Donald Trump. But you know what, some of his generation did vote for Trump. And some of his generation are eating Tide pods which, I will concede, seems exceedingly dumb.

If we were to explore a Venn diagram of these two facts about his generation, I have a feeling that a number of people greater than zero have both voted for Trump and also eaten a tide pod!

What does this say about the collective intelligence of Joe Kennedy III’s generation (which I assume is supposed to be Millennials)?

Fucking nothing! Nothing at all! Members of my generation voted for George W. Bush. Twice!

Was my generation the one that made huffing a thing? I can’t remember. You know why? Because I didn’t do it!  Just because some members of my generation did a dumb thing is no reason to shit on every member of that generation.

Also, this meme is just lazy. Really, conservative jokester who still somehow doesn’t realize Trump was a sorry excuse for a human being long before he became a sorry excuse for a President? The best you can do basically say “well America is fucked as soon as those Tide Pod eating fuckers take control?”

I have a few alternate suggestions:

“All while his generation is arguing over ‘The Last Jedi’ even though none of them even saw the original ‘Star Wars’ in the movie theater.”

“All while his generation can’t be bothered to turn out and vote.”

“All while his generation spends more time looking at their cell phones than they do looking at their significant others.”

“All while his generation can’t decide whether or not Nazis are bad.”

“All while his generation drives most of the commerce and growth in this country and we love them and don’t want to piss them off.”

“All while his generation actually gives a fuck about racism and sexism again.”

I mean, they aren’t all winners but come on, lazy meme generator. This didn’t take me very long.

Say Something Video by Justin Timberlake

Timberlake is in town for the Super Bowl and look, I don’t know how you feel about Justin Timberlake and I really don’t care because this video is off the rails amazing.  You don’t have to like his music but watch it with three things in mind:

1) It is a single take.

2) It took exactly one take to get it right.

3) The music is being performed live.

That’s right – nobody in this video is lip syncing. They sang the fucking song live. They did it once. And they nailed it.

And this pisses me off. Because I’m a creative person and in my life, I will never make anything half this good.  Now perhaps that is because I will never work with the 200 people it took to make this music video. That’s fair.