Friend a Day – Matt Allex
In the old days, we didn’t have amateur shows to try out new performers. I put them on stage at the festival and waited to see if they would succeed or fail. Most of the time, it took more than one show to figure out how well they would do.
That’s how Matt Allex joined the vilification tennis cast and unlike many of his fellow performers, he was impressive the first time he set foot on stage and he’s been impressive almost every time since.
What amazes me is knowing that Matt is terrified of stepping on stage and he does it anyway. The more an idea scares him, the more willing he seems to be. His ability to rise above his own fear and consistently be one of the best people on stage is an inspiration.
Matt has a remarkable intellect that, I fear, goes unrecognized behind all the dick and fat mom jokes. He is blunt with an opinion when the direct opinion is required. He is unflinching in his ability to laugh at himself.
He’s also one of the most emotional people you will meet. You want to find a guy who cries at the end of movies? Matt is your guy. Make fun of him all you want but how many people do you know who are that open with their emotions?
When I was in college, one of my professors talked to me about the “um” meter. Simply put, if you are speaking in public, pay attention to how many times you say “um.” Most people say it more than once a minute.
When Matt starts speaking, he hardly says “um” at all. He can engage in stream of consciousness talking for minutes at a time and he will remain interesting the whole time. It’s a skill that few people possess and because I always have the “um” meter running on myself, I always notice how frequently he beats me.
Matt will do whatever it takes to make something work. If he only gives 99% to something, he will view his participation as a failure.
I’m glad Matt walked on to the Vilification Tennis stage that day so many years ago. My life would be a great deal less interesting if he hadn’t.
Matt has a couple of podcasts you should follow. He’s co-host of Apropos of Nothing and Horrorshow Hot Dog. Check them out!
Friend a Day – Patricia Wick
Photo by Peter Verrant
24 years ago today, I married my best friend. Because she is still my best friend, it only makes sense that she would be my subject for today’s blog.
Pat is one of the smartest people I know. When I’m trying to work through my opinion on something, I will always ask her opinion because if she doesn’t agree with me, I am probably wrong. She can beat me at just about any game except cribbage and when she tells me how she did it, I feel like an idiot because I didn’t try the same thing myself. If I try the same thing the next time we play, she’ll beat me some other way.
There is only one person in my home who can find something when it is lost and that’s her. It doesn’t matter if she’s never even seen that thing, when one of the other three people in the house ask her where it is, she’ll probably know. That she tolerates our ignorance never fails to impress me.
We talk about a lot of things and argue about very little. She laughs at my jokes, which in endearing and so very polite.
She supports all of the theater work I’ve been doing lately and that is invaluable. It takes me away from the family far more than I like and her patience is amazing. Without her patience, it would be hard for me to do any of what I do.
When I write something, she is always my first beta reader and not just because we live in the same house. If I’m writing comedy, I want to know if she’ll laugh. If I can get her to laugh out loud even once, I figure I’ve managed to write something at least a little bit amusing.
She’s also willing to be critical. She’ll tell me when something doesn’t work. She’ll tell me when a lyric sounds wrong. I may not always agree and I may not always make the change but she is never someone to rubber stamp my work and tell me it is perfect.
If you ask me what the secret to a long marriage might be, I’m afraid I don’t have great answers. For me, though, I know the secret is that I married someone I liked a lot. I never tire of spending time with her. A walk around the lake with her is the most pleasant way to spend an hour that I can imagine.
24 years is a long time but I know I’m married to the right person because it doesn’t feel like all that much time at all.
Happy Anniversary, Pat. I love you!
Thanks for being my best friend.
Friend a Day – Cathy Wick
If you want mom’s vote, you’d better be able to do math!
For Mother’s Day, my friend a day is my mom. I love my mom because she’s my mom but because this is a Friend a Day post, I’m going to write about why I like her a lot.
Just this last week, we went to see Neil deGrasse Tyson speak. I went because mom got an e-mail about the event and asked if I wanted to go. Not being stupid, I said absolutely yes. We had a great time at that event and Dr. Tyson has always impressed me as someone who is excited about teaching people about science.
He’s not the first person who taught me to be excited about learning, though. That person was mom. She’s was a teacher of mathematics for most of my formative years and she was good at it because she loved sharing math with kids. She wouldn’t just talk about her work day, she would talk about the ways she was teaching math that made her excited.
I always tell people I’m the child of math teachers because I’m proud to have come from that background. Math teachers are awesome. Mom taught me that.
I love going on vacations with mom because she gets so completely immersed in what we are going to do. We are heading to Yellowstone later this spring and ever since the plans were made, she has been watching the Old Faithful webcam and sending me regular messages when the geyser is about to erupt.
She keeps trying new things in her life and I think that is part of that teacher mentality that she should always be learning. Right now, she is doing a sketch journal and talks about it a lot. It is a new thing that has her really excited and I think that’s great.
She’s always looking for new things to get her excited. And she always finds them.
I love my Mom, yes. But I also like spending time with her as a person. For that, I feel incredibly lucky. Thanks, Mom! Happy Mother’s Day!
Friend a Day – D’Lis Schmidt
Image from MRF Friends
D’lis isn’t on line at all so there is a decent chance that she will never see this post. She is not interested in the tools of modern society because she is perfectly content with the tools she already possesses.
I think D’Lis is the only person who calls me “Timothy.” She calls everyone by their full names whether that is how they prefer to be addressed or not. I think she views it as a sign of respect.
My birthday falls right in the middle of the Renaissance Festival season. When I turned 25, it was on a Saturday and as usual, I expected no fanfare because I never expect my birthday to be a big deal when it is on a show day. Halfway through the day, D’Lis came up to me in character (because when she is on stage she is always in character) and “accidentally” dropped something into my lap.
It was an astrolabe necklace. I still wear it as part of my costume.
Many years later, D’Lis had been given the Lee Walker Award, which is the highest honor you can receive as an MRF performer, and I was talking with Mark Lazarchic about her later that evening. He said she had given the best advice he’d ever gotten as a performer – do something that scares you every day.
These stores about D’Lis are probably the best way to explain how much respect and admiration I have for her. She is kind and thoughtful but also one of the most devoted performers I’ve ever known. When she was on stage at the festival, she was on stage.
She was always interacting with the audience. She was always interacting with other performers as their characters. She understood what it was to be a street performer in a way that few others really did.
D’Lis also taught me a valuable lesson about standing up and demanding what you feel you are worth. She was not the sort of person to look at a contract for performance and say it was “good enough.”
She has been off the street for the last few years, working in a shop. I try to stop by and visit her there but let me tell you this: that is not where she belongs.
She belongs on the street because she brings an amazing game there.
I’m fortunate to have learned from D’Lis. She’s a great teacher.
Friend a Day – Duck Washington
Photo by Peter Verrant
I’ve gotten more involved with Duck as a collaborator in the last few years and greatly appreciate the eclectic array of talents that he brings to a project.
Duck can be an actor, writer, producer, and/or director when the situation calls for it and he can do all of those things exceptionally well. He has a ton of creative and interesting ideas that differ from each other a great deal. Most artists will produce a lot of work that follows a similar path. Duck produces such a varied body of work, it is amazing.
He takes a very relaxed approach to just about any project. His response to any challenge seems to be a simple belief that he can do whatever it takes. I’ve never seen him stressed about a deadline. Instead, he is always looking forward to the next challenge.
I think it is his love of the new challenges and his willingness to throw himself into anything new that comes along that makes him so good at it all. He has a huge bag of tricks from which he can pull.
He also seems to love the work. When he shows up to rehearse, you get the feeling that he is happy to be there. He enjoys the process of creation, no matter what role he plays in that process.
As a person, Duck is laid back and pleasant. He’s a remarkably good listener who will often spend a lot of time absorbing what someone has to say before adding his own voice to the conversation. He’s a person with whom conversation is never dull.
Duck and have been collaborating more and more frequently lately and that makes me happy. When he becomes part of a project in which I’m involved, I know that it is going to be better than what I produce on my own.
I really enjoy the time I’ve spent with Duck over the last few years and always look forward to the next project.
Duck produces The Encyclopedia Show every month. You should check it out!
Friend a Day – Christin “LeXi” Davies
LeXi, like a lot of people, came into my life through CONvergence. She and a few others offered to help take over the Main Stage department of the convention when we desperately needed someone who knew what they were doing.
They brought consistency to that department for many years and it was a department that required consistency.
LeXi was the organizer in those early years. She would get stressed out about stuff in part, I think, because she really wanted things to be done right. If something went wrong and it had been in her power to fix it, she would be extremely upset.
She’s passionate about a great deal. I’ve had lots of conversations about the convention with her and I appreciate how strongly she feels about so many things. She wants to provide a great experience for the convention attendees every time.
In addition to being one of the people in charge of running a huge convention, she is also a jewelry artist and does really nice work. It’s clear she puts a lot of that passion into her art.
There is a force of personality she has when something needs to be done that has served her well a great many times. When she is in a room full of people and something needs to get done, she is one of those people capable of mobilizing them and getting it done.
Sometimes you can care about what people think of you. Other times work needs to get done. When it is time for work to get done, LeXi isn’t worried about anyone’s feelings.
For many years at CONvergence, closing ceremonies would end and after a few moments, LeXi’s voice would clearly ring out reminding everyone that we had a room to get clean and if you weren’t going to help, you should probably get out of the room.
That’s a big room and she’s not a big woman. But everyone heard her and she didn’t use a mic. The work needs to get done and she is there to make it happen.
LeXi is a great person and I’m glad that she came into my life when she did.
You can check out her Etsy page here.
Friend a Day – Geoffrey Brown
Photo by Peter Verrant
I met Geoffrey at the Siouxland Renaissance Festival about five or six years ago. At the time, he was playing with The Lost Boys and after watching one of our sets in which we sang “Zombies in the Shire” and “If I had a Million Chickens,” he asked why we didn’t have a song about zombie chickens.
A fair question that led to the song “Brawk Brawk Brains.”
My point, I guess, is Geoffrey has been an inspiration from the get go.
Since Geoffrey joined the Dregs, I’ve had the privilege to get to know him a great deal more and I’m better because of it.
Geoffrey has become a valued collaborator when it comes to writing music. He does a good job polishing lyrics and can come up with very catch guitar riffs in just a few minutes. When the two of us get together to write, we can bang out a song every hour or so. Not every one is brilliant but there are more hits than misses.
I’ve used Geoffrey for all of my Big Fun Radio Funtime shows and often hand him extra bits to do at the last minute specifically because I know he can handle anything I throw at him with very little preparation.
I like to hang out with him outside of “band time” because he’s got a hearty laugh and a sharp wit.
Every time we perform together, he thanks me (and everyone else he performed with). That genuine gratitude for being able to share a stage with other people is endearing and a good reminder to tell other people you are grateful for the time they spend with you.
He works very hard to be involved in his daughter’s life, even though she is a long way away most of the time. I think that it is admirable how important that bond is to him and how hard he works to maintain it.
Geoffrey has taught me to be grateful for those around me and for that I’m grateful to him.
Friend a Day – Guinevere Lazarchic
Back when I was doing a lot more hand drumming, I played for Guin at the Feast of Fantasy. She has always been a graceful person and not just as a dancer. Guin’s grace as a person extends far beyond her grace as a dancer.
She’s always exhibited endless positive energy. She smiles all the time. Her voice is kind and calm. You always feel good being around Guin.
I’m also always impressed by her patience. She seems capable of dealing with whatever challenges come her way in a calm fashion. Life may catch her by surprise but the surprises don’t phase her.
Guin still dances at the Feast years after I’ve moved on to other things. She has mentored many young dancers who have gone on to perform on their own. Her talent is definitely rubbing off on a new generation.
I always liked working with Guin as a drummer because she understands that what we were doing was a kind of dialogue between dancer and drummer. We all worked together to create the dance and if we weren’t in sync, the dance wouldn’t work.
I like seeing people who are so clearly in love with one another and you certainly see that in Guin and Mark. There is an adoration that they share that makes you realize how fortunate they are to have found one another. The best part of that equation is that I think they are both well aware of how lucky they are.
Guin does not have a forceful personality but there is a great deal of power to her even so. She is kind and gracious and in being so, she is as strong as anyone who is loud and bossy.
I’ve been fortunate to know Guin for all these years and fortunate to work with her for some of them. She has always been someone who made my day a little bit brighter.
Friend a Day – Tony Miller
Photo by Richard Rose
The first thing you notice about Tony is his voice. It is rich and clear and can cut through just about any other sound. He makes his living off of his voice and it is easy to see why.
If you spend any time talking to him, you will learn how fiercely intelligent he is. To write the material he writes, he has to be intelligent but the depth of his knowledge about so many things will surprise you.
I only get to see Tony seven weekends a year because he lives the nomadic lifestyle of a career Renaissance Festival performer. It is a lifestyle to which his is clearly suited yet it means that there’s never enough time to hang out with him.
He has the most genuinely friendly nature of anyone I know. That may seem odd for someone who makes his living insulting people, but when he walks up, shakes your hand, and tells you he’s happy to see you, you know he’s telling the truth.
We’ve had him on a couple episodes of Geeks Without God and they are two of my favorites simply because of how knowledgeable he is about the topics at hand. He has read a lot about many things and he has thought a lot about them as well. He doesn’t arrive at a conclusion lightly and if he has arrived at a conclusion, it would do you well to understand why.
As a performer, he is one of the best. He knows how to say the most vile things to people and they will be smiling and laughing the entire time. On the other hand, his complements are amazing. I’ve hired him to complement my wife simply because I know he’ll be able to do it better than I can.
Tony is one of those people you should find the time to get to know. He’s never around for long but when he’s around, everything is a little bit more interesting.
Friend a Day – Erin Kasper
Erin and I have been around the Renaissance Festival for a long time and as a performer, I can’t tell you how valuable I think she is to the cast.
Over the years, she has been one of those people who sees a need and steps in to fill it. She doesn’t do it because she wants attention. She does it because she thinks that it is important.
When we needed an Entertainment director, she did it because someone needed to. When the Children’s realm was without leadership, she stepped in to take it over. When nobody was making sure the years of service awards were happening, she stepped up and did that.
Most of what she does is not audience facing work. That makes it all the more valuable because she makes it easier for the entertainers to entertain.
She’s also one of the best one on one street performers I know.
About ten years ago, there was a cold, rainy day at the festival. There were hardly any audience members and I remember looking at Erin and saying that there was probably one audience member for every entertainer. The two of us decided to adopt a couple for the day and proceeded to walk them around the festival for about three hours.
It was one of those entertainment moments nobody sees or talks about but for those two people, it was extraordinary. Erin gives people those extraordinary experiences all the time.
Erin is one of those people who works really hard and then plays just as hard. I’ve had great times with her juggling torches around a bonfire at Omegacon, playing black light mini-golf at CONvergence, and laughing at dinner after long, hot weekends.
Being around Erin reminds me that some things are important and they won’t get done if you complain that nobody is doing them. Sometimes you just have to do it yourself.
Erin is a great person. I’m so glad that she’s a friend.
Grail Diary 